"The wealthy, not only by private fraud but also by common laws, do every day pluck and snatch away from the people some part of their daily living. Therefore, when I consider and weigh in my mind these commonwealths which nowadays do flourish, I perceive nothing but a certain conspiracy of rich men in procuring their own commodities under the name and authority of the commonwealth.

They invent and devise all means and crafts, first how to keep safely without fear of losing that which they have unjustly gathered together, and next how to hire and abuse the work and labor of the people for as little money and effort as possible."

Thomas More, Utopia

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Obama vs. Obama

The following public service announcement comes courtesy of Mark Fiore:


Big thanks to Dennis Perrin for introducing me to both Fiore above and Dwayne Monroe who authored the following message to disappointed Obamaniacs:

I know you're unhappy.

You tell me, via email, text messages, tweets, listserv posts and maybe even tachyon bursts I'm not yet equipped to receive.

You tell me -- and the world -- you're disheartened by Obama's velvet gloved treatment of ibanks, his failure to "take advantage of a good crisis." His inability to speak to any group of black people without yammering on about "personal responsibility" (a theme conspicuously absent from his speeches before mostly white audiences).

His escalation of the Afghan war. His supposedly groundbreaking national medical insurance plan which, once closely examined, looks an awful lot like a funds transfer program for the pharma and private insurance sectors.

His continuation of Bush era surveillance programs. His backtracking on same sex unions. His... by the gods, I could go on, but why?

Listen mates, I have some bad news for you and your ruined dreams...

You should have paid closer attention during the campaign. You should've spent a little less time shouting about new, "post-racial" politics, the excitement of "young people" and Obama's polished, upper management style of presentation and more time thinking through the totally predictable implications of the things he said.

What the hell did you think he meant when he said he was going to "step up" US efforts in Afghanistan? Air drop delicious snake cakes and DVDs? When a potential or sitting POTUS announces a "renewed effort" he (and one day soon, she) means only one thing: bombs, blood and blasting.

I know, that's three things.

Months ago, when you read stories about Obama's popularity among our well-fed hedge funders, what did you think that meant? Wall Street loves "diversity"? It meant those mercenaries were pointing their mojo wands towards the guy they felt would produce superior ROI.

And so on.

During the campaign months, many of you wankers (and yes, I love you but...) accused me of being cynical. Why didn't I open my heart and believe in change? Change! My black and tan amigos y amigas were dismayed I wasn't happy to see the ultimate example of a black face in a high place. Dreams, no longer deferred!

Well-intentioned pink skins scratched their heads, puzzled by my lack of glee at their non-racist action: voting for a black chief exec. Look at us!

To be cynical however, you have to be a disappointed romantic. Within each cynic's skull throbs a mind longing to believe with the fervency of a "Twilight" fan. My objections weren't cynical. I simply took Mr. Obama at his word and factored in the history of the office he sought.

So there you are, upset and worried. You're upset by how things have turned out. You're worried that unless Obama does this or does that -- zigs instead of zags, kerpluks instead of plukeriking -- his presidency will fail. Which is hella odd: what presidencies have succeeded and by whose criteria?

I recommend spending no more than five, maybe ten minutes being disappointed. And perhaps an extra half hour musing on the various things the President should do to save his historic legacy.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Funny stuff, Coldie.

I think that those on the far left will enjoy it as much as the white bread Republicans.

"leftisthebest"

Coldtype said...

You're right Lefty, I think I'll send the link to Rue now that you mention it.

Anonymous said...

It is already posted on shavedlongcock.blogspot.

Shavey gave me credit on the post, but I gave you all the credit in the comments section and gave the address here. So perhaps we shall see some new readers (and posters). It may be interesting.

"leftisthebest"

Coldtype said...

Sounds good.

Anonymous said...

REPRINTED (WITHOUT PERMISSION) FROM TODAY'S SHAVEDLONGCOCK.BLOGSPOT

ColdType said:

France? Sounds like a place I could live.
July 28, 2009 9:21 AM


lefty and coldtype in the steambath:

Wah wah wah! The U.S. is such a terrible place! (Sob!)

If Bush is elected, I'm moving to France! (Sob!)

If Palin is elected, I'm moving to France! (Sob!)

I love Obama because I'm not a racist but he isn't doing the job right so I'm moving to France! (Sob!)

(all the above said in a whining tone)

Go already, you cowardly assholes!

Those of us who have balls will stay here and fight for the restoration of our constitutional republic.

July 28, 2009 10:05 AM


(I think it a tad humorous, whatta you think?)

"leftisthebest"

Coldtype said...

I agree Lefty. Stupid but humorous. I like how the writer managed to not address a single one of the issues I raised in that post.

Anonymous said...

More stuff:

The only two non-haters i see posted here are leftisbest and ColdType"

One in the same person.
July 29, 2009 4:41 PM


Sorry to disappoint you, but we are different persons. One can tell that simply by the writing styles. Also, I know not how to run the webpage it does.

I realize it is hard to believe there are two TRUE leftists on the job, but deal with it. Not to worry though, I doubt there are any others.

"leftisthebest"

By the way here is Coldtype's page:

http://coldtypes-lair.blogspot.com/

July 30, 2009 5:20 PM

SHADY! said...

Hey LITB, don't ferggeddaboudt MEeeeeeee... Rumors of my Deaf have been SoMeWhAt egxasperated!

Nice job on your `Blog, C.T.!

"You Make Me Wanna Be A Better Blogger!"

Stay Safe Out There (ALL U BLUE!)

SHADY! said...

By the way, I voted for NADER (again, after Kerry in `04; not that many people even know/remember him, except for blaming him for 2000 / BUSH League Jr. swiping the Crown...) What ya gonna do... might as well just eliminate these middle-men and vote straight for the Mega-Corporation of your choice... I'm brainwashed by Apple, they get mine in 2012... who's YOUR favorite CORPse?!?...

Anonymous said...

Welcome back Shadi!!!

I figured either you pulled the pin or turned away from the left and became a writer for Lou Dobbs.

"leftisthebest"

Coldtype said...

Good to hear from you Shadi! I second Lefty, welcome back.

Anonymous said...

Shady,Coldy,Lefty all the same person.

SHADY! said...

In your Damp Dreams,
my fellow Sockpuppet SWEET-BABY-RAY! ;=)

P.S. - W.W.J.D. = Where Will Jody Do you next... under his desk?!?!

;=) Stay Safe Brother (=: